Yes Lord Yes

This evening as I sit here and gather my thoughts I can feel God prompting me with the chorus of a hymn I learned as a child.

Yes, Lord, yes, to your will and to your way.
Yes, Lord, yes, I will trust you and obey.
When your Spirit speaks to me with my whole heart I'll agree
And my answer will be yes Lord yes.

If only it were that simple.  I don't always say yes to God's will though.  I don't always say yes to His way of doing things. Some days it is hard for me to trust Him and some days I disobey. 

Why is that?

Because I am a sinner.  I mess up. I make mistakes.

No big words.  No excuses. No religious sounding explanations.

A while back I sat in a church service and began to hear God prompting me to speak to an older lady that was sitting a couple of rows in front of me.  It was not a very full church service and there was no one sitting between myself and where this lady was.  I knew that I had briefly been introduced to her before but I didn't remember her name. 
The singing part of the service was going on and I knew that I'd be given a chance in a matter of minutes to speak to her.  By this time God was giving me the words to say to her to encourage her.  I was overwhelmed in my own head, struggling with whether or not this was really a message from God and if it could really apply to this lady. After all I didn't really know anything about her.
The signing had ended now and we were given a brief break to greet the people around us.  This was my chance. 
I stood frozen in my seat.
I was far to uncertain of myself to approach this lady and speak to her.  The moment passed and the message began.  What do you know though? God's still there whispering in my head that I need to talk to this lady.  He is giving me very specific words to say and rather than pay any attention to the sermon I am practicing in my head how to approach this lady.  I'm going over and over it and battling back and forth in my mind if this could really be what God is telling me or not.  I decided to make a deal with God. (I know, crazy right.) Anyway, I told God that if it was really Him that when the service ended I'd be easily able to slip over to this lady and speak with her.  But, if it wasn't from God then someone would get in my way or she'd go the other way or something.  The reality is it should have been really easy to get to her because there was no one sitting between where I was and where she was. 
So the service ended and we're all standing up to be dismissed.  As soon as the Pastor says the last word the person on my other side turns to me and asks me a question.
It wasn't just one of those "How are you today?" questions. It was a legitimate question that needed my attention and needed a response.  So I take care of the situation and then when I turn back toward the lady she is gone.
I was a bit discouraged.  But then I thought to myself oh well, must not have been a God thing because I should have totally been able to get to her.  As the afternoon went on though I just couldn't get it off my mind.  In fact it came to my mind several times as the week went on. I thought about the lady and the words God had given me for her all week long.
The next Sunday came around and I am in church again and sitting in just about the same seat.  As I looked up I see this lady walk in again.  She walks past me and she walks to just about the same spot as the week before.  Before she even sits down though I see another person walk up to her.  Someone I know and have a lot of respect for.  This gentleman greets her very warmly and then begins to speak to her.  I am two rows back but I can hear the conversation.  He is saying to her the exact same words that God had given me.  You can see peace and joy just wash over the lady as she is encouraged by the words the man is speaking to her.  It is a beautiful moment.  I know she is being blessed by the words he is saying to her. I was so happy for her but I was so sad for me.  I had missed an opportunity to be used by God.  I wasn't willing to follow the path that He had for me.

I have learned from this experience. Yes, I still have doubts and questions from time to time but I want my answer to be Yes, Lord, Yes.

Yes, to Your will and Yes, to Your way.
I want to trust, I want to obey.
When Your Spirit speaks to me with my whole heart I'll agree
And my answer will be Yes, Lord, Yes.